throwing one more dice

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For many of us, there is always a point where we stop and think, is this what I am meant to be doing with my life?

I made a decision some days ago to abandon altogether something in which I have invested close to 5 years and a shitload of money and effort. I could no longer shake the niggling feeling that I was at the wrong party.

My heart wasn’t really in it from the start, but I kept telling myself that if I worked hard enough, it would all be okay. I could learn to love it. No such thing. That little voice just gets louder with time.

I am a firm believer in pursuing the things we are passionate about and good at. It makes no sense at all to have a talent for one thing, but spend your life chasing after something you’re not very good at because you’ve let people convince you that it is “better-paying” or “it will open doors for you”.

I am in essence throwing away the past five years, and pretty much starting fresh, and I am shitscared, but I also have a very good feeling about this.

I just stumbled across this little article, and I’m taking it as yet another sign:

Be willing to fail—doing something you love.
In 1997 I had just graduated from law school (with tons of student-loan debt) and was interviewing for high-paying positions at big firms. The problem was, my heart wasn’t in it. So I took myself out of the running in order to build a small Internet publishing company with a friend. After a year of barely staying afloat, our venture went the way of a 404 ERROR message. I was broke and unemployed, and Sallie Mae was hot on my tail. I wondered what endeavor I should try next.
It sounds crazy, but once again I decided to throw caution to the wind and just do what I wanted. I began working as a trial attorney for the U.S. Department of Justice. Over the next few years, I held a wide array of fascinating jobs that I took because they captured my imagination: serving in the military, reporting from Iraq for the Washington Post, and, most recently, becoming a full-time author. Some might consider me flighty for changing careers so often, but I contend that the key to professional happiness is asking yourself two simple questions every single day: Are you passionate about what you do? And if not, what are you going to do instead?

Bill Murphy Jr., the author of The Intelligent Entrepreneur

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7 responses »

  1. I want to register my encouragement for you on this. Thing is, why do people want us to spend our lives living their dreams, and not ours? God did not make a mistake to give us the passions He gave us; and if passion be the driving force, I guess it makes sense for us to do what we love rather than what we are told is safe.
    And the thing is that life is fucking hard. But only when you love what you do and are passionate about it will the hardships shrink in comparison to what you hope to gain, and what you actually gain as you do stuff—I mean the fun (first of all), and then the other benefits, whichever they may be.

    Just my 200 shillings.

  2. Are you kidding me? This is the sign for me to do what I want. Been at the crossroads for far too long. All the best in that journey. You are a brave soul

  3. “If you’re not doing what you love, then you chose fear.”

    I choose fear every morning at 8 30 am, but I hope the situation is only temporary.

    I want a blogpost on how African parents encourage us to choose fear, when probably what our economy most needs is dynamic, daring young people willing to try new things, fuck them up, start over and break boundaries. I think that’s something most of us struggle with.

    Good luck

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