The Freshly Ground concert that I was so looking forward to has been cancelled. This is because the band was double-booked for shows in East Africa and South Africa, apparently. That manager needs to be fired, evidently. Well, now I have 80,000 shillings with which to fix my wonky glasses, but I also need to make fresh Saturday night plans.
Christmas seems to come earlier and earlier each year. I blame it mostly on these damn supermarket chains that started hanging up tinsel and lights and things before I’d even decided what to go as for Halloween. (A sexy witch, in case you’re wondering) Aside: If Uchumi puts out that caroling Santa this year, I swear to God, I will draw genitals on its face while no one’s looking!
Anyway, despite our family tradition of no-gift-giving, I have decided to make holiday gifts for the family. Taxidermied rats. I got the idea after watching Dinner for Shmucks (hilarious. go rent it now) – they just looked so cute and I thought I could do a few to resemble (and possibly, though unintentionally, mock) my parents and siblings. Once they get past the formaldehyde smell and the deadness of the rats, I think they’ll really appreciate my gift.
Other than that, it looks like a trip to the village, as per our same ol’ yearly plan for the holidays. As I get older, I have come to appreciate this version of a Christmas celebration: to get away from the bustling consumer-driven madness of the city (after doing a week’s worth of shopping for our trip, of course) and spend a few days in the relative tranquility of our charming little village home, surrounded by family, cows and copious amounts of boxed wine.